Special Agents: The Mysterious Case of the Monsters Under the Bed (Part 5)

SpecialAgents

 

(Part 1)

(Part 2)

(Part 3)

(Part 4)

Rachel nudged Lauren as the car jostled along flying over the roads at speeds that would baffle the mind of any policeman on duty that night.

“What?” Lauren hissed.

“Tell him.”

“Tell him what?”

Rachel sighed, crossing her arms and rolling her eyes. “You’re joke. Tell him your joke.”

“Did someone says something about a joke?” Tom said from the front. He kept his eyes on the road as he whipped around a corner appearing suddenly out of the dark.

Lauren and Rachel smashed together in the back seat until Tom straightened out.

“Well?” Tom said.

“Fine,” Lauren said. “Knock Knock?”

“Who’s there?” Tom said.

“Woo.”

“Woo who?”

“Where’s the party? Is there cake?”

Tom chuckled to himself, his big belly shaking, as he drove the car towards a city full of lights.

“That’s great, just great,” he said.

“I made it up,” Lauren said, happy that he liked it.

“Did you?” Tom said. “You just might be a comedian in training.”

“Maybe after I get too old to be a secret agent, I’ll do stand up comedy instead…” Lauren mused.

“Now, I have a new pun,” Tom said. He cleared his throat and sat up straighter. The city grew closer and closer. “Earl Grey was away on business during the election. So he cast an absent-tea ballot”

Lauren and Rachel shared a glance.

“Umm, I don’t get it,” Rachel said.

“Me either,” said Lauren.

“Earl Grey? Absent-tea?” Tom said guiding the car past slower going semis delivering goods to the city.

Both girls shook their heads.

Tom sighed. “Never mind. How about a song? We’re almost there, but we got time for one song.”

“You always want to hear the same song,” Rachel pointed out. “We’ve learned others, you know.”

“Yes, but it’s such a fun song, and I met Johnny Cash and June Carter once,” Tom said.

“We know,” the girls said in unison. “We’ll sing it.”

Singing together as fast as possible, the girls sang:

I was totin’ my pack along the dusty Winnemucca road,
When along came a semi with a high an’ canvas-covered load.
“If you’re goin’ to Winnemucca, Mack, with me you can ride.”
And so I climbed into the cab and then I settled down inside.
He asked me if I’d seen a road with so much dust and sand.
And I said, “Listen, I’ve traveled every road in this here land!”

I’ve been everywhere, man.
I’ve been everywhere, man.
Crossed the desert’s bare, man.
I’ve breathed the mountain air, man.
Of travel I’ve had my share, man.
I’ve been everywhere.

I’ve been to:
Reno, Chicago, Fargo, Minnesota,
Buffalo, Toronto, Winslow, Sarasota,
Wichita, Tulsa, Ottawa, Oklahoma,
Tampa, Panama, Mattawa, La Paloma,
Bangor, Baltimore, Salvador, Amarillo,
Tocapillo, Baranquilla, and Perdilla, I’m a killer.

I’ve been everywhere, man.
I’ve been everywhere, man.
Crossed the desert’s bare, man.
I’ve breathed the mountain air, man.
Of travel I’ve had my share, man.
I’ve been everywhere.

I’ve been to:
Boston, Charleston, Dayton, Louisiana,
Washington, Houston, Kingston, Texarkana,
Monterey, Faraday, Santa Fe, Tallapoosa,
Glen Rock, Black Rock, Little Rock, Oskaloosa,
Tennessee to Tennesse Chicopee, Spirit Lake,
Grand Lake, Devils Lake, Crater Lake, for Pete’s sake.
I’ve been everywhere, man.
I’ve been everywhere, man.
Crossed the desert’s bare, man.
I’ve breathed the mountain air, man.
Of travel I’ve had my share, man.
I’ve been everywhere.

I’ve been to:
Louisville, Nashville, Knoxville, Ombabika,
Schefferville, Jacksonville, Waterville, Costa Rica,
Pittsfield, Springfield, Bakersfield, Shreveport,
Hackensack, Cadillac, Fond du Lac, Davenport,
Idaho, Jellico, Argentina, Diamantina,
Pasadena, Catalina, see what I mean-a.

I’ve been everywhere, man.
I’ve been everywhere, man.
Crossed the desert’s bare, man.
I’ve breathed the mountain air, man.
Of travel I’ve had my share, man.
I’ve been everywhere.
I’ve been to:
Pittsburgh, Parkersburg, Gravelbourg, Colorado,
Ellensburg, Rexburg, Vicksburg, Eldorado,
Larimore, Atmore, Haverstraw, Chatanika,
Chaska, Nebraska, Alaska, Opelika,
Baraboo, Waterloo, Kalamazoo, Kansas City,
Sioux City, Cedar City, Dodge City, what a pity.

I’ve been everywhere

Tom grinned. “I swear neither of you took a breath, not one.”

“We need to learn a new Johnny Cash song,” Lauren said.

“How about the one about the car?” Tom suggested. He pulled to a stop in front of a two-story house on a quiet suburban street. The clean-up crew parked behind him. Rachel leaned over Lauren to look out the window.

“Looks pretty quiet,” she said.

“Too quiet,” Lauren said.

“Let’s head in.”

“You girls be careful,” Tom said. “I’ll be here with the engine running. Agent Carmichael says we’ve got five houses to take care of.”

Lauren nodded. She drew her Super Soaker and held it in her left hand. With a double-check on Rachel, she drew the Pause Toy. The girls pressed the red buttons on their guns. Time to take care of some monsters.

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  1. Pingback: Special Agents: The Mysterious Case of the Monsters Under the Bed (Part 7) | A Gentle and Quiet Spirit

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